"Cobalt" [Redacted]

Class: Shadow Sorcerer
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Race: Eladrin
Pronouns: They/Them
Orientation: Pansexual
Age: 268
Height: 5’9"
Weight: 185lbs
Voice: The fuckin John Mulaney Robot Voice
Location/ home: born on a mountain raised in a cave truckin and fuckin is all i crave
Deity: N/A
Known aliases:

  • Neptune
  • Draeva
  • Bread

Status: Alive

Personal/General Information

Cobalt isn’t evil, they just have a very warped system of honor. Instead of an eye for an eye it’s an eye for the whole fucking body. If someone wrongs them, they want that person to atone HARD. This works in reverse as well though. Although their way of talking to people is generally abrasive and dickish, they’re happy to help others when asked because they see this as a way to bring good fortune back on themselves. They’re especially nice to people that they see as being very smart or very ambitious because they see those people as a reflection of their own goals. They are inherently mistrustful if anyone in a position of power, especially in the clergy. Will not tell anyone their real name under any circumstances. Writes down the name of everyone they meet, and keeps running notes on them. Everyone gets a tally mark for any time they wrong Cobalt, which cobalt assumes is every time they do pretty much anything. If you were to get a good look at the notebook, it would seem like an ethnography of the people around them. Very detailed notes and statistics of everyone they get close to.

Physical appearance

Dark skin with lighter freckles, especially on the shoulders/chest and the bridge of the nose. Black curly hair that hits about midback, has a couple braids in it due to elf shit but nothing super fancy (more functional than anything). Eyes are brown with horizontal pupils like a goat. They have six extra, buglike eyes (three on either side of the face) that do not blink in sync with each other. They have three mouths and only talk/eat with the middle one but smile with all three. Have tiddy. Build is kinda stocky but they don’t appear super muscled. More squishy than anything. Their hands are calloused. Elf ears kinda floppy, move like a cat’s does.


Cobalt was born at the ripe age of zero and killed at the significantly riper age of 130. Before this, they spent their time running street cons in order to get money to support their family. They ended up scamming the wrong person, and for that they were poisoned, and thus have no idea who did it and have no helpful information (basically a Pushing Daisies corpse). Cobalt woke up in a church to Corellon, having been resurrected by a priest named J.P. Slutboy (thanks nate). Cobalt was pretty grateful to be not dead so was like “How can I repay you? I’ll do anything?” In the shitty town this happens in, most of the elves are very closely aligned with the fey, so they run on the ideas that names have power, and that word is literally binding. So basically, Cobalt cannot physically or mentally go back on their word. The priest was like goddamn this bad boy can fit so much unpaid labor in it, and Cobalt was then forced to work off a life debt for 130 years. They didn’t have to do anything terrible, they were basically a janitor for the church. This was a smooth operation, the priest had done it before. Because of this, lots of people were cycled through the church, also working off life debts. Most of them ended up working off their debt and leaving the church, saying they would come back to help those left behind. However, most of them didn’t. Cobalt got rightfully pissed and spent the majority of their debt boiling in hate for priest mcdick. They made friends with a few people in there, a small girl child and an actual grown woman. When their contract was up, they stole gear and travelling supplies from the priests quarters. They looked through his stuff until they found his identification and wrote down his real name (names have power). For the past 8 years, they’ve been travelling and writing down the names of every person they meet, keeping a record of any personal offense against them. They plan to one day become an archfey, and to return to collect the souls of those who have done the most damage. They also want to return to that church and free everyone currently held there of their debt.

Their goal(s)

  • Attain Archfey status
  • eat the rich (especially Shitpriest Mcfuckdick)
  • die in their sleep

Journal entry / quote

the small one did not bless me after I sneezed. they will rue this day.
today I was looked upon by a passerby. I did not get their name. I will never know peace.

Miscellaneous Information

  • Capricorn sun (ambition, sarcasm, fucking ruthless)
  • scorpio moon (an eye for an eye, observe people for funsies)
  • Virgo rising (an upsetting and controlling person)

They change their fake name fairly often, and thus have a couple of aliases (Neptune, Draeva, Bread)

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